The holiday of feast is not to be faced for another year for me. the rest of my family is still looking forward to the pumpkin pie i made, of which i have to whip the cream for them after this post. i am one for holidays, but this one does not suit me. it had turned it's meaning into an all out feast, such a break from what it really was. and what it really was wasn't all that pleasant either; as the pilgrims made their home here, they drove away and killed off the native americans. well, us here in america today like to forget that true past and focus just on the feast part they had, i can give us some credit i suppose in focusing on the time where the pilgrims and native americans made good with each other. but really, how many of the people here today focus on that? not many, maybe some with such a meaning driven mind as mine do. everyone just likes the food. that's all anyone talks about, and that's what most of the informations about today is for.
the holiday itself isn't as anxiety provoking as it could be. we have really low key holidays as the family is just my mum, dad, brother, sister, and myself. the other family that we used to share holidays with have died, oh but one moved away. what i dont like is the focus on food all day, the stress around timing all the dishes correctly, making sure we have everything and everything is done right, only to sit and eat for merely a fraction of the time spent cooking. i dont feast out either, so that's not an issue either. im now aloud to just have what i want. it used to be that there's be a big argument over the portions i was giving and scales were often involved to make sure i was getting enough. i made the vegetables and stuffing and that is what i ate. i would have had a bit of turkey but butter was placed on it so it was a no go. after i made this known, my mum remarked "that's just sad, very sad." but i am okay going a life without butter! and i didn't even mind not having turkey, not really my thing anymore. ive been backing off of meat lately.
MY LOVELY CHAP
my dad noticed during dinner that my ring was on my right finger, and commented on it. i happened to hang out with him the day i got it, and i was switching it between right and left ring fingers, as it didnt feel quite right on the right finger, but felt lovely on the left (a sign perhaps? i made out through the meaning*).
"i am, it finally feel right on this finger." i said. then i explained to my mum and sister, "dad didn't like me wearing it on my left finger."
"i kept on thinking you were married," he noted.
"yeah... i secretly got married." i said in a way between being serious and joking.
my mum mumbled something as i said, "he's quite the lovely chap."
it took me a while to get her to clarify her mumbles. it turned out to be something along the lines of "like you have time!"
i defended myself: "I have time on the weekends! and in the morning!"
"like you get up early."
"on the week days, after i drop off the boys."
"like when you go for a run, then go home and shower, and go to pick up the boys," my dad cleverly pointed out.
"true. i go get charlie and we then meet my lovely chap for lunch. charlie loves to go out!."
i was making it all possible for me to have this lovely chap. if only he were real, and i could have valid ways to prove it besides a ring i bought for myself.
later i realized another time we could be together. "well, just maybe my lovely chap goes on my runs with me."
"except the time i saw you," my dad said.
"i had sprinted ahead of him that day," i made up on the spot, although it couldn't hold true as i told my dad i was taking it easy that day due to an injured shin.
"or just maybe he was off walking the dogs!" i pointed out that grand possibility. this day has been filled with plenty of dog talk, so that was the perfect end to my defense of having this lovely chap, who will hopefully one day exist.
*a line from a jacks mannequin song "every scene was a sign, we made out through the/their (?) meaning)
p.s. a horray as i've just figured out how to fix the text and make it block! my life is back in order.
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